The Popularity of Books About Saying Yes to Life... and Why We Still Say No

The Popularity of Books About Saying Yes to Life... and Why We Still Say No This past week, I started re-reading Yes Man,  by Danny Wallace.  A comic memoir about a man who decides to say yes to everything for the rest of the year, its  a fun read. Plus it always makes me think:  Gosh darn it, Steph. You really need to say yes to  life  more. Meanwhile, as Ive been re-reading, Ive said no to: a mommy and me music class at a local nursing home, a pumpkin parade party for toddlers, a Halloween Dance Party at the dance studio where my husband and I used to take salsa lessons, and a deep restorative experience at a yoga studio at which I used to teach. And I  love  deep restorative experiences. Clearly, I learn nothing from the books I read. Yet I continue to hoover them up like Pixy  Stix, and I know Im not the only one. Just this past year, Shonda Rhimes blew us all away with  Year of Yes,  a memoir about how yes changed her life.  Even more recently, Mindy Kaling followed up  Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?  with  Why Not Me?,  a collection of essays on her ongoing journey to build a happy life. And though its not as well known, I was completely charmed by Noelle Hancocks  My Year with Eleanor,  a work of stunt journalism in which the author determined to do one thing every day that scared her. On the flip side are those books that show us an alternate reality in which we might say no to our boring, humdrum lives (which, by extension, means saying yes to something more exciting). Jon Krakauers  Into the Wild,  for example, captured imaginations with its account of a young man who walked away from all of his worldly possessions and walkedâ€"ba-DUM-bumâ€"into the wild. Frances Mayess  Under the Tuscan Sun  allowed us to imagine that it might actually be possible to run away to Italy, buy a farmhouse, gorge ourselves on pasta, and find love. And on the fiction side, I just fell madly in love with Gayle Formans Leave Me, in which  an overworked, underappreciated mother with a full-time job has a heart attack. After her return home from the hospital, the narrator gets the sense that her family resents the time she’s taking to recuperate. Overwhelmed and angry, she decides to run away. (Let me just leave this book right here on my husbands pillow as a warning) What is it we love about inspirational books that challenge us to embrace life, and why is it thatâ€"when we turn the last pageâ€"we usually just go back to business as usual? Formans  Leave Me  pokes and prods at a possible answer. But when I explore that question for myself, I imagine several possible explanations. For one, as a work-at-home mom on a freelancers salary, I dont encounter many opportunities to say yes to anything life-changing or exciting, nor do I have the money or opportunity to peace out on my obligations and eat-pray-love my way straight outta Jersey. In fact,  if I spent an entire day saying yes to every request or  invitation, Danny Wallace-style, Id likely just end up with a toddler jacked up on yogurt, and a list of social gatherings I couldnt attend because, again: toddler. I assume many other readers are similarly hamstrung by reality. For another, as much as I love the  idea  of living under the Tuscan sun, I am lazy and also comfortable and also set in my ways. My life might be boring, but Im sorta  happy  with my boring life. Saying yes to a less boring life sounds  exhausting. And following naturally from my previous point is the fact that, in certain cases, books are  read as escapism, and nothing more. Theyre a way to live vicariously through the experiencesâ€"or fictional realitiesâ€"of others, giving us that sweet contact high before we finish the book and dive back into our day-to-day. What are your favorite books that let you temporarily imagine a life of yes?